Localizing Mistake
sdmtponorogo.com – Some of our children’s or students’ behavior may make us disappointed. Such as they do not immediately pray when the time comes or sometimes they speak bad words. Our response to this negative behavior is usually by a reprimand.
However, we must confess that there is good behavior of children/students that make us grateful such as they are helpful and always ask permission when leaving the house.
The challenge is how the parents and teachers stay focused on each existing behavior. Positive behavior gain appreciation and negative behavior gain wise reprimand.
Because we often find the parents and teachers think that when a child do a negative behavior it causes him or her to be reprimanded, but the reprimand often continues with other children’s behavior that has nothing related with the first negative behavior. So, as if all a child’s behavior can become negative if he continues to do the negative behavior.
For example, when a child delays his prayer time, we assume that everything the child does is negative because we understand that delays prayer time is negative behavior. Prayer is an important part of charity and will be the first to be reckoned with on the Day of Judgment, children must do it on time.
I don’t blame the understanding that prayer is very important, but we cannot assume that if children don’t pray well then other activities automatically become bad. In fact, we use the good behavior of other children/students as a means to improve behavior that is not fair.
Let’s try to localize in our thoughts and behavior when a child is not good at one behavior, don’t bring this problem to other aspects of the child. Remember there are many other good behaviors. In fact, when we also focus on other good behavior and we appreciate it, insha Allah the children’s negative behavior will change to the positive or good behavior.
When you see a child’s mistake, localize the mistake, but when you see the child’s goodness, expand it.
Miftahul Jinan
Griya Parenting Indonesia
